Tooth and Nail

tooth_and_nail_xlgSaturday’s final film, Tooth and Nail, may well have been my favorite of the weekend. There are several I can point to along various axes and say, “I liked that because…”, but Tooth & Nail is the one whose scenes I’ve been flashing on whenever I think about the weekend. In a post-apocalyptic future (with a reasonably clever backstory), people must scavenge and struggle just to have sufficient food and water, but at least the initial waves of looting and killing have ended. Now, though, a new threat is rising in the form of bands of cannibalistic Reavers Rovers who roam the landscape in search of their own next meal.

And I know, I wasn’t all that impressed either. But it turned into something a lot bigger than its summary. The focus is on one such group of survivors, trying to eke out a day to day life in a hospital, rather than heading south where most people have gone. Out on a raiding party that includes one of the college kids from Borderland, they find the first live humans they’ve seen in months, in the midst of being murdered. They chase off the killer in time to save a girl, who turns out to be Penny from one of last year’s standouts, Penny Dreadful. (I mean, the actress, not the character. That would be cool, but somewhat unlikely.) And everything seems to be going pretty well, friction among some of the group members notwithstanding. But then their leader, Professor David Carradine, is murdered. And the next day, there are people outside the hospital. At this point, newcomer Neon (née Penny) admits to having heard of these Rovers before; they killed her family and neighbors where they were holed up in a supermarket. One per night, so the meat wouldn’t go bad. But she thought she’d escaped from them, and didn’t want to cause unnecessary panic.

A deadly game of cat and mouse ensues, as Neon and the others make various plans for survival, night after night, and each person must come to a decision about how far he or she is willing to go to stay alive. The final voiceover about fighting tooth and nail maybe oversells the message, but I can’t really think of another flaw the film had; and this one was quite a bit less glaring than the zombie people who looked like the rats that infected them, so.

Mulberry Street

One of the weird things about Horrorfest 2006 was the lack of zombies. With nine movies’ worth of material, how do you not have a zombie outbreak? There were slashers and vampires, as well as ghosts a-plenty, and let’s face it, there aren’t all that many scenarios left after you’ve gone through such a list. But I guess the important part is that there was a zombie movie this year, so I’ll just focus on that.

I think it’s fair to say that Mulberry Street was the most technically impressive film of the weekend. Shot on grainy color film stock, usually with a video camera look, it had the same documentary-style feel to it that helped to make Night of the Living Dead so famous. And the acting was every bit as solid as anything I saw in Borderland the night before. Other than an odd choice for the premise, everything about it was done right.

In short, the rats in New York City start biting people, for no apparent source cause. And those who are bitten become first ill, then insane and violent, and eventually start to, you know, eat other people. Who, if only bitten without dying, turn into zombies themselves. Unfortunately, they turn into zombies who look like rats, also with no real explanation. It doesn’t really affect the movie in any way, which is good; it’s just an inexplicable stylistic choice that, for me, failed. Like I said, though, I can let one odd premise choice slide. All that said, the movie is actually about several people in a tenement on Mulberry Street downtown affected by these goings-on, including a retired boxer, his daughter returning from the war, a single bartender and her teenage son.

Despite these victims being neighbors instead of strangers, the comparisons to Romero’s original classic are inevitable. It has the feel that so few zombie movies have anymore, of that first whiff of panic and the turning tide from optimism into determination in the face of hopelessness, and then into despair. In point of fact, I still like Night of the Living Dead better, by virtue of the fact that Mulberry Street is a little too bleak for my tastes. It hits all of the notes right, though; if you’re looking for a powerful movie about people trying to make it through adversity, you could do a lot worse. (To a larger extent than is explainable by these all being horror movies, that’s an ongoing theme throughout the weekend’s films.)

Lake Dead

MV5BMTQ2MDk1OTA0Ml5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwMzU5MDM4._V1__SX1217_SY911_The opening salvo of Horrorfest’s Saturday film list was a palate cleanser. I could also have said that of last night’s Unearthed, except that there was nothing to be cleansed from and that said movie really wasn’t as good. And, okay, I’ll be opening up a little bit of confusion by claiming that Lake Dead was a good movie, so I want to be clear and say that it wasn’t good. It was slightly better than the Skinemax fare it occasionally looked like, and it had a truly excellent climactic line of dialogue. But good? No.

It was, however, extremely awesome. Three sisters stand to inherit land and a motel from a grandfather they had been told was long since dead, after he’s murdered during a moral dispute. They gather up their skintight clothes, their slutty friends and frat-boy dates, and head off to check out the inheritance and decide whether to sell it. If it wasn’t for the inbred locals, this would probably have been porn instead of horror. The acting quality and the looks of the cast both bear this out. All of which is basically my point about the awesome: hilarity ensued at every point. The lines were funny on purpose almost as often as they were due to the acting failures, the slasher-style chase scenes had to have been intentional parody, and the foreboding “But is it really over?” finale was probably populated with the actors who hadn’t quite been skilled enough at their auditions to get into the real movie.

I think I’ve long since been established as a person who can appreciate a bad movie, if it’s done the right way. If you’re like that sometimes, this should be on your short list of rental gold. (Or, I guess it’ll still be in a theater near you sometime next week, maybe.)

Borderland (2007)

The third film of the night was also the best, although it seemed less like a horror movie to me than a drama with very horrific elements. Borderland is another entry in a relatively new breed of horror films such as Hostel, Turistas, or Wolf Creek, in which people on vacation run afoul of unsavory local elements who intend to perform diverse deadly acts upon their bodies. In this case, three Texan college students wander down to Mexico for general debauchery and run afoul of a murderous and approximately Satanic cult, which they must struggle for survival against with the help of a few locals.

As a thumbnail, that sounds pretty generic. I’m here to tell you that the actual movie was both shot and acted exceptionally well. Each of our heroes had a different take on the mingled anger and hopeless despair of the situation. And if the majority of the cult members didn’t have much individual personality beyond “I’m going to kill you with a machete now, and not in the nice way”, well, the way they were filmed going about their business was far more realistic and disturbing than I’m usually comfortable with. And of those with personalities, the leader was spot on with his suave and utterly evil self-assurance, the muscle was even better at being simultaneously inhumanly effective and batshit insane, and Sean Astin’s disciple reminded me strongly of Dennis Hopper in Apocalypse Now, with every bit as much talent.

There are good, solid reasons not to want to watch this movie. But they pretty much all revolve around how you feel about the content, because the presentation will be hard to top this weekend, and for my money stands up well among the movies that have been released this year.

The Deaths of Ian Stone

MV5BMTQxMjU3ODgxMl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwNjIwMDM4._V1__SX1217_SY911_Have I mentioned that this weekend is HorrorFest? I’m thinking I maybe have, but there’s probably no way to be sure! Anyway, this is another weekend with way too little sleep and the necessity to whirlwind through my reviewing schedule to even have a chance of keeping up. Mind you, I’m not complaining. It feels like this weekend was created just to make me happy. Downside: It’s the second weekend of two, and the theater was basically empty all last night. Ten or fifteen attendees per film? As much as I don’t like crowds of people, that makes me sad. With rare exceptions, movie crowds don’t trigger any of my social anxiety at all, and I love the energy of a full crowd of fans at a premiere. My promise to myself, therefore, is to go the first weekend, next year. (I don’t actually know that there will be one next year, but I assume there will.)

I’ve been rather looking forward to the night’s second movie, The Deaths of Ian Stone, for several weeks now. It seemed very cool from a description which is not that different from the one I’m about to provide, and came very close to living up to my expectations. The Ian Stone in question is a regular bloke with a regular life, which includes as highlights a cute blonde that he likes to flirt with or possibly date and a lot of oddly familiar stony-eyed people who spend their time staring at him. The problem is, the staring people eventually try to kill him. The bigger problem is, they succeed. And then he snaps out of a kind of doze at 5:02, in different surroundings, nay entirely different life circumstances. And it starts all over again, with a brand new set memories and the occasional leakage from some previous life that he has no evidence ever really happened. He’s got to find a way to break out of the cycle, because dying a lot is probably pretty unfun. Except, any time he starts to realize what’s going on, his mysterious stalkers are right there on hand to kill him all over again. And, of course, is there any way to be sure any of it is really happening at all?

Yay, spooky paranormal mystery to unravel! The only negative I have to report is that, like so many mysteries out there, the solution’s pursuit is far more entertaining than the solution itself. But it’s hard to hold that too heavily against them, when it’s the norm. Also, for any Dexter fans (and you should be), the girl who plays Lila is in this movie. I don’t guess I have a particular point to that statement other than to praise Dexter. But the actress is really hot, if that matters to you.

Unearthed (2007)

MV5BMTczODI3NjQzNF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMTE5OTc0MQ@@._V1__SX1217_SY911_Have you ever wondered what would happen if Alien had never been filmed, and the concept sat on a shelf for 30 years, only to be released today as a Sci-Fi Channel original motion picture, set in an isolated corner of New Mexico rather than in space? And instead of being a bit-player warrant officer, Ripley is a sheriff with a dark secret, hovering on the verge of alcoholism? And instead of being trapped on a ship together, they’re trapped by a closed road and insufficient gas to get to the next town in the other direction? And instead of… well, no, that’s pretty much all of the actual differences. The characters aren’t all identical, I mean, but the four main ones are, which is plenty enough.

My point is, if you’ve ever wondered that, you should really see Unearthed. In the style of Alien, it chronicles the discovery of an alien life form that probably killed all of the Anasazi, has been rediscovered on an archaeological dig, and will now kill all of everyone else if possible. Unless Sheriff Ripley and her doomed companions can find a way to stop it, I mean. …okay, “doomed” sounds like kind of a spoiler there, I guess? I was using literary license; in reality, basically anybody might survive. (Well, not the black guy. You’ve seen a horror movie ever, right?)

Y: The Last Man – Girl on Girl

51DmVpA+bwLThings I have noticed about Y: The Last Man today, while noting that some of the things may be specific to the volume I’ve read, Girl on Girl, and not necessarily to the entire series:

1) The stars are aligning in an always entertaining but still highly improbable manner to get Yorick all the way to Australia, half way around the world and despite a variety of more logical destinations. Perchance to be reunited with his long-missing fiancée, Beth?
2) Men are not a necessary ingredient to make pirates entertaining. Yar!
3) In a world without men, lesbians really do show up a lot more often. Mmmm, lesbian pirates.
4) You know all those action movies where the bodyguard dude is keeping some material witness or annoying-voiced diva singer safe, and they start to fall in love? I guess it’s reasonable for that to happen in reverse too.
5) I suppose that’s all? It was a surprisingly short book.
6) Oh, and dream sequences are still always awesome. See also the Sopranos and that one episode of Buffy at the end of the fourth season.

Preacher: All Hell’s A-Coming

51ATQIvJSvLFor a transition book, All Hell’s A-Coming was surprisingly satisfying. On the one side, Jesse Custer, his girlfriend Tulip, and Cassidy the Irish vampire have finally started to sort out the truths behind their various ongoing interrelationships, in advance of Jesse’s final push to complete his vindictive quest in pursuit of God. And on the other side, Herr Starr, Allfather of the Grail society, is making his own final push to sort out that organization and take control of Jesse Custer once and for all. It promises to be a three-way (at least) clash for the ages. But, you know, mostly that describes the yet unread final volume. Like I said, this one is all about the transition.

In addition to Jesse’s search for answers as to his supposed friend’s true nature, the eighth entry in the Preacher series provides closure for several side characters and a little bit more history, this time of Tulip’s journey from birth to the failed assassin we first met in Gone to Texas as well as one of her early adventures with Jesse and their longtime friend Amy. All good to read and ranging from funny to emotionally horrible to ultra-violent, but with almost no movement towards the final resolution of the series. I’m kind of concerned that most things won’t really be wrapped up in the one book remaining; there hardly seems to be enough space. But, like Salvation, I can definitely say I liked this one a lot, overarching storyline be damned.

Tyrannosaur Canyon

136641Sometimes, the best way to judge a book is by its cover. I know people say not to and that it’s a bad thing, and I’m willing to grant that in the metaphorical cases of the phrase, that might have universal merit. It probably doesn’t, because some peoples’ covers are pretty much exactly as advertised. But it might. For actual books, however, that advice is completely insane. Sure, feel free to use other measuring sticks as well, but some good old-fashioned cover-judging is how you end up with books like Tyrannosaur Canyon. Right there on the cover, you have a tyrannosaur-head fossil, as well as a blurb that is being voiced in your head by the “In a World…” movie preview guy, explaining all about the mysterious missing moon rock, the fossil prospector, the evil paleontologist, and all the rest of the characters rounding out this airport thriller that promises (still on the cover, mind you) to be at least twice as good as anything by Michael Crichton.

As for how good it actually was? Well, honestly, probably not as good as Jurassic Park, what with JP having actual dinosaurs and all versus plain-jane fossils and kidnappings and manhunts through canyons and government black ops conspiracies. I mean, all of that stuff is cool, and makes for an exciting read. But it’s no chased by dinosaurs and unix hacking, now is it? Definitely better than The Da Vinci Code, in that the prose is substantially more thoughtful and not nearly as overwrought, and not incidentally because of Tyrannosaur Canyon‘s lack of monastic self-flagellation. (Not to be confused with its lack of monks, as that would be counterfactual. Don’t believe me? Just check the cover.)

Saw IV

I made an interesting discovery last night. In addition to being appropriately grotesque, being good fodder for morality discussions, and including the occasional jump-in-your-seat scares and/or nudity, the Saw movie series also has an intricately convoluted plot[1] that rewards multiple viewings of each movie as well as of the series as a whole. The four films have covered between six and eight months of in-series time, now, and each successive entry relies heavily on knowledge of the previous episodes to be able to best follow the new twists and turns. This is probably the smartest horror franchise of all time. (Which, okay, is about a hundred years now. But still.)

Saw IV has what they all have: a few people in individual short-term traps with the choice to force themselves to live via pain and sacrifice or die easily, as well as an ongoing storyline in which Jigsaw is trying to impart an important lesson upon one or more main characters. Everything you think you understand about what’s happening will be wrong, until it all falls together in the final frames. Which is another piece of intelligence about the series. Knowing that there’s a twist coming doesn’t make any difference in the ability to anticipate it correctly, and not particularly because of hidden information. Almost everything you need to know is present on the screen, and Jigsaw essentially never lies or even attempts to mislead. I guess some truths, we’re just conditioned not to hear.

To the extent that anyone will be willing to listen to me recommend a horror movie, I have this to say. It’s extremely violent in disturbing and disgusting ways. But if you can stand that (it makes me squirm, a lot) or at least peek between your fingers occasionally during the bad parts, I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised by how much and in how many ways each of these movies will make you think.

[1] Mike: you know how the time travel movies come along, and the reviewers complain about how confused they are, and it’s ridiculous? If a reviewer said that any of these but the first one was hard to follow, I would be willing to cut them a fair bit of slack. (In fact, albeit mostly due to mixing up two of the characters that looked too much alike, I needed Pete’s help to be sure I knew what had happened in this one. But I also found that I had missed a lot of detail in the first three movies as well, during said research.)