In case you’re wondering, there are two factors that led me into the treacherous mazes of kid movie-dom. 1) There’s only one thing I actively want to see that’s out right now (leaving aside things I’d be willing to see a second time, I mean). 2) Nearly everyone I know who isn’t me, and certainly everyone local, has kids. And since we were all free for the holiday yesterday, the obvious conclusion was to catch a flick. And Night at the Museum has seemed to be the best kid-movie option of the season. On the other side of it now, I’m willing to stand by that pre-assessment.
Still, though, it was a kid movie through and through. When you’re a dad and you’re afraid of disappointing your son one time too many… Here’s the thing. I started to say what kind of thing you do in a grown-up movie vs. in a kid movie. But let’s face facts. Unless you’re actually irredeemable, your eight-year old son isn’t going to get disappointed in you in an grown-up movie. But when you’re stuck in a kid movie and you’re afraid of blah blah blah disappointment cakes, you go get yourself a steady job as a museum night watchman, and make sure that it’s in the museum where the magical artifact of plot convenience animates all of the exhibits and skeletons and statues and so forth. Because kids dig that.
While you’re at it, may as well include a couple of pretty girls as potential love interests, a comedic fight with a monkey, and a sly reference to a certain movie from last year about the forbidden love between a man and his cowboy. Because now you have something for everybody! Okay, though, I’m being harsh now. The plot was dumb, but since it wasn’t supposed to be anything more than a vehicle for a cool premise, I can forgive that. I mean, not if the execution of the premise was terrible, but as it happens, the execution was absolutely fine. So, cool museum hijinx plus cool effects means that if you’re the type of person who has an undiscriminating kid who wants to see a movie, almost any other choice you can make right now would probably be worse.